Astonishing Amounts of Crap

Just to shake things up slightly, the word "crap" in today's title will not refer to the England team or any of the 22 muppets (plus Muppet Baby Theo Walcott) who wear the three lions. Instead, it will refer to the FIFA website and it's absurd set of "VIP columns"

Although the word "starfucker" was not actually coined to describe FIFA President Sepp Blatter or the various homunculi who surround him, you wouldn't know it from the way they behave. Not satisfied with booting out fans and reserving up to a third of the seats in World Cup stadia for corporate sponsors and celebrities, FIFA's website now has a bizarre and wholly worthless policy of giving celebrities carte blanch to spout utter drivel about football.

Among the VIP columnists: Claudia Schiffer, Mikhail Gorbachev, Def Leppard, Justin Chancellor, and Wolfmother, for Chrissakes. For sheer surreality, though, asking Gary Player to comment on the Ukraine-Saudi Arabia match seems hard to beat (presumably Osama Bin Laden and Prince Fahd were both unavailable...)